IS YOUR STORY HOLDING YOU BACK FROM FLOURISHING?
Trust me I know all about this! I did hair professionally for 11 years. I was born and raised in a house that has a hair salon in it! My mumma bear is a hairstylist still to this day! I have been listening to the gab since I was born. I know that it can be really wearing on our souls to take on other peoples dramas all day. Hairstyling certainly isn’t the only field where we touch peoples souls.
In my early years of hairstyling…let’s just say most of them…(haha) I went along with the gab. My problems were their problems, and theirs were mine. It was like a sharing is caring thing…What I didn’t realize was me, and my clients were enabling each other to be the victim of our circumstances. This is really unhealthy.
I was chubby, and in my mind I was fat. I was self conscious, and angry about it, so I took it out on every boyfriend I ever had. This lead to jealousy and dramas, which all made their way back to my chair. Clients ate my story up, sympathizing for me. “Oh you poor thing!” Blah blah blah. I seemed to be attracting their stories too. It seemed everyone had crappy husbands, boyfriends, and even the guys they were having affairs with. Yes…People tell their stylist everything! It all seemed like something we could joke about at the time. I am not a very serious person, and as a hairstylist you become quite the story teller! So most of this came off as joking. Looking back on it…My story SUCKED!
I would poke fun at my weight all of the time, poke fun of the stupid drunken situations I would get myself into…My story was ever evolving, and always being elaborated upon. I did this for years and years and years.
Two years ago I was still telling a story I wasn’t happy with…and still filling my mind with other peoples stories! No one was helping anyone! I felt so lost! My relationship was falling apart! I had to take a moment away from all the gossip!
I decided to go on a 5 week spiritual adventure to Guatemala with one of my best friends. We both needed a life break! We did a month long retreat on Lake Atitlán, doing 1.5 hours of Yoga/day, 1.5 hours of silent meditation, and metaphysics class. We also endured 5 days of silence along with a juice cleanse. It was intense, but so worth the lessons that came with it! There I learned how to be present in the moment, and I also learned how to listen. (I am sure in the future I will elaborate more on this incredible experience.)
After I got home I knew things had to change. I was still feeling kind of miserable has a hairstylist, and finally I put my finger on it when I started working in the Personal Development industry on the side. I didn’t want people dumping their garbage in my mind anymore! I also, didn’t want to just agree with people for the sake of agreeing anymore! So I started to play with dialogue. I am not going to lie…I lost some clients because I would no longer listen to them complaining the whole time, but I started building my dream clientele in the end. All because I became more proactive in my conversations. Absolutely anyone has the power to take charge of their language, and what they will tolerate listening to! NO EXCUSES!
A huge thing I have learned from our Personal Development Education is that when we empower others we empower ourselves. The opposite is also true. If I said to you “I just can’t seem to lose weight.” and you said…”I know it is so hard.” Regardless of whether you are fit or not…we are not doing each other a service. After making the statement “It is so hard to lose weight.” our reticular reactivating system takes note of that in our minds, and this becomes our truth. So I started taking action in my life so I could respond differently in those situations. My response started sounding more like “Well have you tried checking out any YouTube vids?” I was doing free workouts on YouTube like an animal back then, and still to this day on my FB Wellness Meow page I post every workout I do. This holds me accountable to myself and to others. SO AWESOME! This shift in taking action in my own life, and my thinking helped me out massively in my relationships with people. Listening to Personal Development audio, reading, and researching wellness gave me an arsenal of tools to help me change my beliefs into more positive ones. This has made it much easier to leave a positive imprint on everyone I come into contact with. (It also gave me the belief in myself to walk away from a career I was doing really well at, and shoot for my passion, which lives amongst the stars. Hah more on that another time as well.)
SO the whole point of this is you get to choose the story you are telling. You are not only telling it to others, but you are telling it to yourself again and again and again….ALL DAY LONG!
WHAT DO YOU WANT YOUR STORY TO BE?
Because my beautiful friends…It is in your hands to write it. It is in your hands to set the example for yourself and your loved ones!
Love within, love around.
Erin Nicole Bick